I was in a similar situation. He was in the country just a different state. I also was given tons of empty promises, gave birth alone, etc...

It took until my kids were almost 3 years old before I decided enough was enough. I stopped putting in all the effort, file for child support, stopped apologizing, etc... in less than 2 years he completely disappeared from our lives. He used to take photos I would send his family of my kids & post on social media & say things like this is why he works so hard although we wouldn’t hear from him for months. Or he’d call at a time when he knew I was still at work & couldn’t answer or super late when he knew the kids were asleep. He did that for a few months before he stopped altogether. It has now been almost 9 years since we’ve seen him and well over 7 almost 8 since we’ve even heard from him. I dealt with all the nonsense because I wanted my kids to have a relationship with him. But I realized that I was forcing something.

Initially it’s hard to let go but it’s so worth it. When my kids would ask I would just tell them that some people simply aren’t ready to be parents. I never say a bad word about him. I let my kids form their own opinions. The amount of stress that it relieved but not putting it effort where it wasn’t wanted was tremendous. I was happier, less stressed, less aggravated & angry. It wasn’t easy but it was the best decision for my kids. If he wanted to nurture the relationship the doors were open.

You need to be a less stressed, happier version of you for your son. Best of luck to you.

Single Mommas