Girls I need help...

This might be long but I don't have anywhere else to turn to

I feel so defeated and tired of everything.

I don't even know where to begin..

I guess I'll start with I was in a mentally abusive relationship with my ex for 4 years. Started off as kids, had a baby, put up with a lot of shit I didn't deserve. I dealt with infidelity, accusations, I was the one working and taking care of everything just putting up with him being a lump on a log and abusive.

Fast forward, I finally leave after it turned physical. I move back home and eventually I end up in a relationship with my childhood boyfriend. Our parents are really close (they live across the street from each other) so he was always around, our parents broke us up so we never ended on bad terms. I always felt like he was the one. He was the person I'm supposed to be with, have kids with, marry..

Now we have a child together. Everything was perfect

But his family is so psycho. I put up with so much and now I found out he's talking to a girl we agreed he wouldn't speak to anymore, plus more. It's just conversation, but some of it is inappropriate in my opinion to say if you're in a relationship.

I've never cheated in my life, even with everything I've been through I remain faithful and put my all into everything. But I feel like eventually he's just going to end up cheating and I don't want to waste another 4+ years of my life. My kids are my focus and I can't take care of them if I'm living like this.. broken and depressed

So basically my question is what do i do... I'm stuck. I live with him and his family, I don't have a job, I take care of the kids and I have nowhere else to go. Is there some kind of help out there that I can use ? I don't want to do this anymore, I need to get out but I'm stuck . I feel so trapped

Philadelphia Moms