My husband and I have been married for coming up on 2 years in September. We have been trying for a baby for well over a year. During the time we have been together, we have had issues like all couples do. Our main problems have been financial as my husband has been unable to work for almost a year after he was diagnosed with cancer which he successfully beat. There have been issues with my parents and they haven't gotten along since a huge fight over a year ago. I feel like I have stood by my husband no matter what challenges we have faced. He is an alcoholic and recently fell off the wagon again. Our arguments have been more frequent and intense and he has been very verbally and emotionally abusive (mostly calling me awful names, constantly accusing me of cheating and lying to him, and he even told me that I will never be able to be a mother, which is a very sensitive subject). He informed me last night that he has filed for divorce. I have mixed feelings right now. I love him and wanted the future that we had always dreamed of, but I realized now that's not happening. I feel like in the last year or so my self worth has disappeared and I am just so lonely and depressed. The only thing that has kept me going is hoping things would get better and hoping that our wishes would come true. But now I know that they weren't our wishes but only mine. I'm also scared cause I'm in my 30s and I'm afraid that I'm going to miss my window of every being in love again and hopefully having the baby that I have prayed so long for. Any words of advice for me as I begin this new chapter of my life?