Maaaaan...

Andrea
So I always hear about my friends relationships where they talk about, "yeah he can't keep his hands off me" 
I have been with my SO for 2 years in November. 
We have a child together. 
I feel like our roles are switched. I want it anytime, day or night... And he... "I just don't want too." 
When we have sex, it's great. 
But he's just never in the mood.. Especially when I was pregnant... 😒
It makes me think I'm not attractive, I'm not good enough, I'm gross, fat, disgusting, and that he doesn't want me anymore every time he tells me he's not in the mood. 
And he always wants blowjobs.. Like that's his thing.. And I'll be like yeah, sure, and get him going and then try and bang, and he's like but I just don't wanna, I just want a blow job.. 
We've also talked about it, and the way it makes me feel, and he doesn't really say anything. And when I ask, "what are you thinking?" He says I don't know, I don't know what to say...
I've never been in a relationship where I had to ask them if they wanted to bang, it just happened.  As soon as they or I would walk in the door, BAM. 
OR WHEN I WAS MARRIED.. He truly couldn't keep his hands off me. 
I just don't know what to do. I've even tried to spice it up with different positions, toys, outfits... Nothing. 
Or at least be affectionate.. Randomly kiss me, love on me, just randomly hug me when I'm not expecting it? 
I just want him to want me the way I want him.. And I don't know.. 
Kinda don't even know what this is even supposed to be.. Question or advice.. Lol
I just need help. Lmao 
Is there something I could be doing wrong? 
I even talked to one of my guy friends, (which is gay) and he stated, " I don't know what's wrong with him, if I wasn't gay, I wouldn't be able to not touch you.." 
So I don't know what the heck to do..