Are you comfortable or are you jealous?

Question

My husband and I definitely look at other people. He has no problem with me going fishing with my male friend from work alone. We have no problem with the other staying out too late having a few drinks every once in a while. We don't care if there's someone liking or commenting on our posts on social media...

But I'm constantly seeing my friends in relationships where they can't text a member of the opposite sex for any reason or something similar. That kinda jealously would drive me nuts!!!!! But my husband and I are very comfortable in our relationship with each other and have complete trust in each other.

So I guess I'm just wondering how many other couples are as comfortable as my husband and I are?

Ps. Looking is not cheating. We got married. We didn't have our eyes removed.

Answer

I don't think that having boundaries means you're jealous or insecure.

Answer

My So and I don't make friends with the opposite gender. It was agreed upon mutually, not because we don't trust each other either. That's just how our relationship is and we are happy that way. To each their own. As long as both people are happy, who cares what they do

Answer

👋👋 I'm the one who says 
"Don't even look at my man" 
I have my own insecurites from the past and although my hubby now is very loyal and trusting I hate that I have to carry those feelings from the past over....

HOWEVER... I have seen to often how someone coming alone in a moment of hurt, despair, or weakness can really ruin a relationship so yup... that's me. Good or bad it's me

Answer

I agree with you to a degree. It's not always jealousy, sometimes it's distrust either in general or more importantly if that partner due to a past issue.

Once you have be cheated on it can scar some forever, and it's not just women. Full trust once broken is hard to heal, and no not everyone wants to give up on the relationship after they are abused in this way. Which sometimes it works out and the offender never does it again, the abused heals and they go on fine. Some times it happens multiple times and they don't.

I'm not saying everyone has been done wrong, but it's something to consider. When people are in pain they often lash out in response.

Answer

I personally despise social media & "liking" peoples' pictures. I don't 100% feel comfortable with my boyfriend "liking" someone's selfie because I have severe issues with my image. My ex boyfriend would "like" pictures of his girl friends on Instagram that were in bikinis & short bodycon dresses. I have never liked what my body looks like in a bikini & it would make me insanely uncomfortable about myself because I knew I'd never look like them & thats clearly something he liked. I know that my boyfriend finds other people attractive, just as I do too, but there's something about seeing his "like" on a picture of another girl that makes me feel inadequate. I would never tell him he had to stop or couldn't be friends with girls. Ever. Unless he gave me a concrete reason to. I'm not the jealous type, but more so the insecure type. My reasons are my own, just as you & your spouses are.

Answer

We are very relaxed and open.  I cannot stand clingy or possessive men, so that would never last long with me.  I equate being comfortable to being secure and that is important to me.

Answer

My husband talks to females, I talk to males. He, more than likely, texts females (I don't touch his phone unless it's acting up and he wants me to look at it). I talk to males. We're happy and in love. I have gone to do things with male friends, because the husband had no interest in it. And vice versa. 
As awkward as it may sound, we're taking our dogs up to hang out with my ex, his dogs, his girlfriend, because my husband hasn't met his girlfriend yet and would like to. 
We do whatever works for us...  which is love each other without asterisks.

Answer

I don't think those are the only options, comfortable or jealous. Every relationship has different boundaries of what is acceptable for them, and what's not. My BF and I are very comfortable, but we are both on the possessive side and have pretty strong boundaries.

Answer

I was like you with my last boyfriend. He had a lot of female friends cause he worked in an office with a lot of women. I couldn't have cared less, I wasn't gonna make him eat lunch by himself. We also both partied a lot seperately. We both knew the other would never cheat.

Answer

I 100% trust my wife but it still makes me mad when people hit on her. (Like I want to punch this girl at the mall. Bitch was touching all up on my woman) but I think that's my own self hate getting the better of me. I always worry some gorgeous woman is gonna hit on her and she's gonna fall in love and leave even though I know she won't.

Are you comfortable or are you jealous?

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