Missing the father of my child..

This is more of a vent and get it off my chest kinda post... I'm 18w1d pregnant, I still don't feel pregnant yet my stomach has always been a little pudgy not extremely so I still can't tell if I'm showing or if it's just my chubby belly bc it's not getting firm either... But the post is more about the father. And please no rude comments.. But here it goes. The father and I are kinda together and kinda not... We were together but we broke up when I told him I was pregnant, not bc I was pregnant, it was for his own reasons and I understood. We still hang out and see each other and have sex and kinda act like we are still together and he still calls me baby sometimes and still has told me he loves me even in his sleep but I still don't get it... And he isn't attached to our child, at least I don't think.. He's pointed out twice that my baby belly is showing it made me feel special but I wish he was more attached and comforting.. He doesn't ask how am feeling or doing just asks how my day was and I guess it's sorta the same. He's not a cuddler anyways at all so I don't expect him to be all over my belly. But I just keep in mind that he's got a lot of other things going on that he's dealing with besides me being pregnant but also this is his fourth child and my first and I don't think he sees it like that... I tell him things and he just seems to not really know what to say.. Like the other day I think I felt the baby kick I only felt it once and so I instantly texted him and all he said was that's pretty cool... I just keep reminding myself that he's still overwhelmed with the fact he is not stable in his life and isn't where he thought he'd be at his age and has a fourth child on the way... So I just kinda enjoy the little things that are slowly happening with my baby by myself bc I don't really have anybody else and I'm excited and nervous for my next ultrasound bc that's when they are doing the anatomy scan so on April 20th I get to find out what the sex is and he's going with me and it'll be the first one he's been to. And the last one I had reminded him a few days before just he knows and he says to me that he'll go if I want him to and I said of course I do, I've just been scared to say anything bc I feel that he might say no and then he was like well you haven't asked me yet and I told him why and that the times of the appointments are usually when he's still working (and he wasn't rude about it at all, it was kind of sweet actually) so I felt he wouldn't be able to ask for a half day bc he's been taking days off over the last few months for other reasons with his other two children BUT he's coming and I'm excited and nervous I just wish I knew what he is thinking.. Like future wise... Is he gonna want to get back together? Is the birth of this child going to bring him around and back to me? Just all these things I hope for, bc he is the love of my life and I'd do anything for him... I just wish things weren't so messed up and confusing..