Irresponsible Drunk

Please no rude comments. I am on this app for advice, not harsh ridicule. I don't drink often. Maybe a few drinks a month. Last night my bf and I wanted to get drunk for the first time in forever. I remember most of last night. But my bf told me that I kept wanting to drink more and more and more. I'm not an alcoholic by any means but if I start to get drunk, (the few times a year that I do) I really have no limits. I feel like I can't let loose and enjoy a drunken night every once in a while with my partner or friends. I drink an excessive amount that always makes me sick that night anyway. It's weird that the only thing I can't remember about the night is drinking more after a certain point. How can I party and still know my limits as a drunk person? Maybe I'm just an irresponsible drunk and shouldn't drink more than a few drinks. Any advice?