This is a post for any woman who have had, or knows someone who has had an abortion or miscarriage.  

How many young woman have ever experienced the emotional conflict so deep it takes your mind to places you couldn't fathom ever having to endure? I have. & I am at that place Right now. This is why. 

On August 11 2015 at 20 years old, I had an abortion. I had never been pregnant before, I never even had to take or buy pregnancy test.

I always did my absolute best to peruse my passions & build on who I am as an individual. But as soon as the test came back positive something inside of me knew, this was something beyond myself. 

When that one test came back positive, my mind shut down and I was in complete shock. "What excuse could possibly be good enough for not giving my all and doing my best?" Was the ONLY thing I could think about. But before I knew it, I was powering through graveyard shifts to pay bills & eating nothing but chicken noodle soup & hot dogs because I couldn't keep anything else down. Deep down inside I knew, I honestly can not do this right now physically, mentally, & emotionally. Suddenly I was in a clinic receiving a 15 minute counselling session & then looking at a ceiling covered in beautiful blue skies & clouds. Rather than being a package of 2, I was one again. Ever since then I have been a mental wreck now suffering from extreme anxiety and psychogenic seizures. Does anyone know anything that could possibly help this horribly long process of grief, guilt, and inner self hatred. I am drowning inside when all I want is to build myself even stronger than before so I can be the person and mom I have always wanted. 😔