Torn whether to find out the gender?

Question

So from the very beginning my husband and I have been adamant that we weren't going to find out the sex of the baby. I'm supposed to have my 20 week ultrasound Monday. We went baby shopping today and found it difficult to find anything that was gender neutral which has me second guessing. I'm afraid that It's going to take away from the excitement of having the baby. Anyone experience this? Or can you guys give me reason to find out or not to find out? I feel so torn

Answer

I didn't find out and it was the most perfect moment of my life. THe whole pregnancy is about the women and it gave my husband the opportunity to tell me the gender and go out in the waiting room and tell everyone else. It was fantastic. And as for the whole gender neutral clothing and stuff. You will be surprised at how much stuff people buy you as soon as baby is born. My mother in law even bought the going home outfit as soon as I had my son.

Answer

I speak just for myself here, but I needed to find out, for those reasons like you listed like preparing for the baby (I LOATH gender neutral anything! Haha just answers quirk about me) but finding out the gender was about bonding and having an identity with the baby. And knowing the gender and name and all that is so exciting and happy experience for my family. They are forming a bond too, and when I hear my siblings say "this time next year Penelope (my sweet baby 👶🏻🎀) will be here" or "let get this dress for Penelope!" It just makes my heart smile! I personally don't undertake or "get" when people say they want it to be a suprise....it's a suprise no matter when you find out! This is just my view point and what worked for me 😊

Answer

My BF and I found out with our first and want to know with our second (won't know for another 4-6W). I can't explain why we want to, I mean I know I don't not want to haha. I think it's a mental preparation thing, we could read up on what's different between raising a boy vs girl, we could focus wholly and completely on picking a few names for one gender. We could buy gender specific nappies for when he got out of his newborn ones & we could buy clothes (not that we went nuts buying blue). It just gave me peace of mind.

My stepsis is expecting her second in 2 years in June (my son will be close to 4 when his sibling is born) & she didn't find out with either. She wanted the surprise.

Answer

I didn't find out. I didn't need an ultrasound so I didn't have one, and I certainly wasn't gonna get an ultrasound just to find out. We act like gender is the most important thing about our unborn babies. I think that's kinda weird. When I pulled her out when she was born, the cord was across there so I figured she was a girl, but I wasn't sure ;) and her dad didn't look, and then he was like "wait, what is it?!?" And the nurses and midwife laughed and said
"Why don't you just look?"

Answer

We haven't found out with any of ours (currently on #3) and I think it's been awesome. I love the anticipation and I absolutely thought having my husband announce the second of the baby was the most amazing and exciting thing ever.

Two benefits that some women tout to not finding out are 1) you are less likely to get overwhelmed with clothes in lieu of actually useful items at your baby shower and 2) you can then use all of your baby items for your next baby without worrying about "Oh, Jack can't use his sister's pink pajamas so now I need to buy a whole new wardrobe!" or whatnot. I personally could care less if this next baby ends up being a boy and wearing his sister's pink pjs but to each her own.

Answer

I actually feel a lot like this now! We had thought we wouldn't find out and for the most part we still want to wait, but... The clothing is soooo cute for boys and girls! I think we are still going to wait. My coworker waited and so many people ended up  buying her clothing after the baby was born anyway! There are some adorable neutral things, you just have to look harder sometimes. Good luck and congratulations!

Answer

Also, about the clothing? You don't need much for a newborn and they grow right out of it anyway :) we were given a few cute onesies with stars and she wore them for the first month. If I wanted pink clothes I could easily have bought them now she's among old.

Answer

If you want a nice nursery I would find out.

Torn whether to find out the gender?

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