OK I am sure I might get some negative feedback for this but I'm not happy about being pregnant again! Honestly I have four older kids and my ministry is just a year old. My husband has been out of work for 6 months. I'm dealing with some unfair legal issues and I'm just too busy building my life for this. My depression is getting bad again and the only thing my Dr will do is give me meds that make me suicidal. I have a great counselor and after 37 years I'm finally getting a driver's licence. Don't get me wrong, I love this kid as much as the rest and he/ she is truly a miracle. Literally medical science says there is no way I should be expecting, especially a healthy pregnancy and God said "watch me!". I just thought I was done and I could have some time to figure out who I am for once. Dam I've already been doing this raising kids stuff for 16 years! Please tell me I'm not alone here. Sometimes I just wish this were not real.