Furious 😡 no one listens to me at all

Amanda • Proud Mother and Wife to my little family
Just need a vent a minute. 
I didn't get to announce to family I was pregnant because as soon as we told our parents they told everyone else.
I didn't get to announce baby's gender because as soon as the cake was cut everyone posted it on Facebook before we could. 
I didn't get to shop for my baby because I got scolded by everyone to wait until "after the shower" ... The shower that I just had yesterday at 34 weeks.
I didn't get to show her nursery to family because they held my "surprise" shower at MY house and everyone went in and looked before I got there.
I didn't get to announce her name because the select few that knew told everyone and those who didn't hear saw it in her nursery.
I was up until 11:45 last night cleaning up after the shower because everyone left and my house was destroyed.
Now my husband says that he'll put all the gifts away and go shop for what we still need while I'm at work so I don't have to strain myself.
I burst into tears on the way outside. I understand everyone is excited, they're trying to be helpful and think of what is best for me and what is like... But I feel like everything that's been important to me is taken away and I'm nothing more than an incubator. 
If I get home and her nursery is cleaned out and everything put together without me even just being there... I will literally sit in my room and cry hysterically for the rest of the night.
I know they mean well... But no one is listening to me when I tell them I *WANT* to be the one to do these things even if it means I have to huff and puff and ache a bit.
No one listens 😞