So we're got pregnant in January, we would have been due in October, we lost our baby at 17 weeks. We found out my close friend was also expecting, she is 23 weeks now. We also found out my sister in law is pregnant, and is 21 weeks. I would have been 18 weeks today. I am not resentful and do not harbour them any ill will. But I know that as summer approaches they will have baby showers. I am not sure how I am going to cope. Is it acceptable to not go and send a gift if I don't feel up to it? Would it be better or worse to go but have to leave because I get upset? I don't want to diminish anyone's joy with my sorrow but I also don't want to hurt feelings. Any advice from someone whose been here?