Who was in the wrong? Long read

Question

So last night it was 11pm and knowing that we had to be up at 6:30am, I told my bf we should go to bed. at 6:15 I woke up by myself and thought we had missed my alarm so I looked at my phone real quick to check the time and saw that I had some personal emails, nothing bad at all but related to a blog about acne that I subscribe to, just stuff that I didn't want him to see. So he wakes up too and sees me looking at my phone and asks what I'm doing. I say I'm checking my email while angling my phone away from him so he can't see the emails. He then starts flipping out thinking that I'm talking to someone. We are now having a big fight about this because he thinks I'm lying. I tried telling him they were just personal emails but he doesn't believe me. Who do you think is wrong? Should I have showed him the emails? I'm now considering changing my story and saying that a guy messaged me just so he will believe me and we can get past this fight. 😰

Answer

I think that's a silly thing to hide. If you know your bf well you should've known that hiding anything would cause him to be suspicious.

You probably would've been suspicious too.

Answer

If you're hiding your phone then he is likely to believe that you're hiding something and he's going to assume that that's what it is but I don't think he needs to be able to see your emails. Maybe just explain that it's a health thing that you're embrassed about (not that I think it's something you need to be embrassed about but you obv are) so you don't want him to see, that it's nothing that will affect him and that he should trust you.

Answer

You're definitely in the wrong. And don't lie about what you were doing. It will only make things worse! That's the craziest thing I've ever heard. Just tell him about the emails, and stop hiding your phone for any reason (unless you're buying him a gift!)

Answer

If you can't share everything with your man  and he can't share everything with you there will be trust issues. My husband and I have free reign to go through each other's phones, emails, social media, anything and everything. He and I know all each other's passwords. There's no reason to be embarrassed about those emails and if you can share them on a public forum you sure as heck should share them with your man. Same goes for him! Clearly keeping stuff "private" or "secret" is causing issues. Just open up! I will never understand why going through someone's phone that you love and loves you is a big deal?

Answer

If they're only emails about acne I don't really see why you wouldn't want him to know about it. I would rather tell him the truth then lie and have him think some guy is trying to talk to you. I don't think there should be anything people need to hide in a trusting adult relationship.

Answer

Why would you tell him it's from another guy if it wasn't?   That is the worse idea I have ever heard.  Show him the emails

Answer

What you did was wrong. You shouldn't be hiding pointless emails from him. Specially being married. That's just going to add trust issues and arguments like you have figured out.
Also, just show him the emails and if you change your story to a lie than it will cause even more trust issues. Be honest and show him the emails. He had every right to get mad specially if your hiding your phone and being shady.

Answer

Don't tell him you're texting a guy, that will make things worse. Just show him the email. You aren't doing anything wrong and he should see that.

Answer

Just show him the emails! If he cares about you he won't care what they are about

Answer

Just show him the emails. I don't see what the big deal with him seeing them in the first place was. If it was you , you would've thought something was up too

Who was in the wrong? Long read

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