Hating being pregnant?

Haley ā€¢ šŸ’™šŸ’™ Baby Boy Due Dec 16' šŸ’™šŸ’™

Before I start please don't be rude or hateful. This is something I am honestly having a really, really hard time with right now.

I've had 2 miscarriages, and was told for years I'd never be able to conceive naturally. Now here I am, with 6 years of infertility under my belt, pcos, and a fibroid tumor... In my second trimester. But I'm hating every second of it. I'm hating my body changing, I hate the way I feel, I hate crying all the time, I hate being a single mom, I hate that I can't sleep, I hate that I can't eat what I want or smoke a cig. The dad left me bc i would not abort but now treats me like dirt, but yet he won't just sign his rights away and dip out. I honestly have not enjoyed being pregnant for one day. And its just disappointing to the point where I just cry all the time because I feel so guilty. I wanted this for so long. Prayed and begged for it. Now it's here and I absolutely hate being pregnant. I never want to do it again.

Is there something wrong with me :(

I love my child, and I can't wait for him or her to be here... But I wish I could just sleep until my due date. I just don't love this.