Diaper disaster! Help!

K

Long, history:

Okay so my daughter is 28 months old, smart, and stubborn. We switched to cloth diapers a few weeks ago (flip covers, bamboo charcoal inserts) and we did so ever so gently. A couple days before I got my supplies in the mail, I ran out of her normal disposable Luvs, and bought Target brand and she was not okay with changing from Monkey's to Polka Dot print. Tantrums of course. Then the cloth diapers came and we switched to those. It took her 2 or so days to get use to the bulk, and she uses 2 5-layer inserts at night with a change in the middle of the night. She's had a light rash on her butt cheeks that come in contact with the diaper insert, but not in the front of her groin. It doesn't seem like a painful rash, just red dots. I rinse inserts and we wash with borax for bad hard water and tide powder free and gentle.

Current problem: The past 2 or so days, she refuses to wear the cloth diapers. She might eventually consent to one, but after it is on for 30 seconds or so, she says "no diaper, I hate this!" Or says that it's wet, or too big, even though it is perfectly dry and not even bunched up or anything. She won't wear Polka Dot or Monkey disposables now either. She will consent to underwear but only sometimes, and she refuses to use the toilet 90% of the time, so potty training would be a disaster. She has no history of UTIs, and no fever, or any specific signs of one. She would rather be put to bed naked and crying miserably that agree to wear a diaper. And forcing one on doesn't work, nor stay on and will probably traumatize her if I try to force it more than I already am. She is compliant with all other aspects of her life. This is exclusively a diaper issue and not just a flat-out bratty 2 yr old issue. She reasons with us on most issues at a level her sister didn't achieve until 4 yrs old.

Question: is this a common reaction to switching to cloth on a strong willed 2 yr old? How do i troubleshoot this? Do I back off and let her be naked and pee on everything? Should I go ahead and pay for an appointment to rule out uti? Do we throw all diapers into a ceremonial bonfire then just wear loincloth as a family? Why does she have a rash now? is the insert type or detergent/aid causing irritation even without the appearance of anything more than a very mild rash (looks like her eczema on her bum even, cheeks have been mildly irritated too off and on the past month). Anyone care to share their knowledge? This is making me sad and it has been exhausting for the entire family.