I'm more nervous than the day before.... I just wanna take this baby home alive and well... It's still so early and I can hardly keep calm... I want my ultrasound so I can see him or her I wanna hear their heart again I want reassurance that this baby has a healthy heart with 4 working chambers.... I just want my baby!!! I can carry them I can make them. It's producing HEALTHY kids is what I'm terrified of...who knew one loss cold screw you up so bad I just think about how am I gonna survive if I have to go through another loss...I'm already crazy as hell from the first one.