Anyone having depression as bad as me.

I feel so alone. This depression is eating me. I don't want to do anything. I just want to run far away. I don't ever want to come back. I feel lost and in the dark. I don't even know what's going on anymore. I don't want to go through anything. I am a sinking ship wreck and it's just getting worse. I don't understand how this could be feeling so wrong. I am laying in bed just crying. I feel so worthless. I don't want to care or feel anything. I don't know what to do. I miss my other babies I placed for adoption. I love the one that's in me but I don't know why I am so damn depressed.