My newborn baby brought me so much peace and comfort in the hospital. My 6 & 4 year old were with my mother and her husband while I was there and we came to stay with them after for about a week & a half until my new place was ready. When I say my two children lost ALL structure, rules and obedience... That is truly an understatement. Since we have been home (moved in to our new place) I have been so stressed, annoyed, exhausted & frustrated all the way to tears. I've even tried to decide what to be become ad dictated to help me cope with my emotions. I've always pushed so hard to do everything correct and to the best of my ability & I worked until week 38. My child is now 4 weeks & I came back to work at 3. I'm 23, might I add. The point of this post is bc I'm loosing my mind slowly, I've never had acne and now it's consistent, I have a pretty bad temper & try my best to walk away from situations but it's sad when your own kids can basically send you to your room. My two older kids dad is back & fourth in the system and my infants father is currently looking for his own place bc he doesn't want to sell his dog. (IKR) not like it will make much difference wether here nor there. This is his first child & I thought he would give a lot more effort than he is but oh well.. I love my princess with EVERYTHING in me. I just feel that I'm unappreciated & nobody ever cares how I feel about anything it hurts mostly bc my kids. It has pushed me to the point of telling them to pack their stuff and I will drop them off at Dfacs. I know I won't, well can't bc I love them so much but it breaks my heart bc I chose to keep them and raise them with or without help & they can't see that I gave up  literally everything to give them everything. I'm a mother first so no hanging out, girls nights, date nights, heck even my body is tore to pieces while all my friends are on the beach looking oh so sexy! I don't know if this is post Partum depression or just my new outlook on life but I'm far from happy & feel 100% alone. Sorry for the long post everyone & im at work now crying like a little/big baby. Any positive vibes or experience you would like to send my way is greatly appreciated.