Am I the only one still in shock about the entire process of their miscarriage? This is going to be TMI. Here's my story.
I found out in Father's day that I was expecting again. I had missed my period by nearly two weeks and had a faint positive on that day and the day following. I told my husband that Tuesday and was in the process of going to the doctor to confirm. I starting feeling very off and was prepping my mind for some tammy bad morning sickness. I turned six weeks on the Wednesday and figured my symptoms lined up. I woke feeling like I was run over my a truck, went to the bathroom, wiped, a noticed I was spotting. My heart sank. I was in disbelief and thought it was implantation since it didn't pick up. I went to work for half day bc I felt terrible and started having mild contraction like cramps with no bleeding. I took a nap, went to the bathroom again, and felt a clot and blood fall into the toilet. I was so mixed up and could barely cry. I thought, "Is this really happening? I haven't even had my appointment yet!" I waited until my husband came home to share the news and we were just silent. I woke upto me bleeding and just knew bc ask my preggo symptoms were gone. Just gone. It was so strange. The bleeding picked up at night and by then, I had bled through several overnight pads that leaked onto the floor and my shoes. Clot-like tissue started coming out about the size of 50 cent pieces and larger. The next morning, I started feeling dizzy bc of the blood loss and my husband stood by as I passed the remaining portions of the pregnancy. He got concerned and almost took me to the hospital bc of the blood. It was crime scene worthy. After I passed what I believe was the placenta, the bleeding subsided to spotting. Just like that, my pregnancy was over or so I thought. Sunday morning, I felt the baby, about the size of a dime, roll iut of my body and into the toilet. I couldn't even bring myself to look. I'm not sure if it was fear or what. I had passed so much that the images alone were more than I could handle. I went to church and felt so empty. Like a shell of a person. It was like I had to live with this info with very little ppl even knowing what I endured. I still have no real emotion. It feels like this didn't happen to me. I feel so disconnected. Is that normal? I mean, it's not my first miscarriage. However, this is the first time it happened this way. I dunno what to think. Any advice would be appreciated as I sort this whole thing out in my mind.