Sorry this is so long! But please read amd reply I don't know what to do anymore.

So my SO and I got together about a year and 7 months ago. Around 2 months in the relationship (at this time we were still in school) he breaks up with me randomly like an hour after he was being loving and even gave me a late Christmas gift! We broke up for less than a day. Anyways 2 days after we got back together he said within the time we broke up he talked to another girl about meeting up to have sex! This girl was a "enemy" of mine and he knew that. He told me they didn't do anything other than talk and didn't actually meet up.

So I forgave him but I did start having trust issues after that I was always paranoid he was talking to another girl. He would always get mad if I looked at his phone and told me I should stop worrying and all that, but then the worst thing happens.

Fast forward almost a year this girl that used to date one of his old friends texted him randomly. (His old friend died in a car crash when he was younger. And my boyfriend I guess believed something else had to happen because he was the only one that died. The girlfriend was in the car at the time.) So this girl is texting my boyfriend and telling him all about her problems and what's going on with her life. That doesn't bother me, but then my boyfriend started hiding his phone more and he even put a lock on it and then would take it off soon after. He started getting mad every time I looked at his phone. But one day he left his phone in the room and I looked at it HE WAS TALKING TO HER ABOUT SEX! Telling her all this stuff he would do to her and she was saying the stuff he would do to him. It went far back since he started texting her. Just constant about how they used to have sex and all that. I flipped sh** so I wait to he comes back to the room and I'm asking him what the hell this was and why would he cheat on me.

First thing he does is get pissed off at me yells at me yanks his phone from my hand and throws it. He starts screaming at me asking why I looked at him phone and how I'm such a bitch and a fu***** idiot and that I don't even know what I'm talking about. So after he yelled at me, pushed and shoved me, and threaten to hit me he calmed down. Now I'm sitting there crying my eyes out wondering what I did to make him cheat. This is his reason: he wanted to know how his friend actually died and since she was in the car with him he was trying to get the answer out of her as to what happened. He told me the only way to get that answer out of her was to make her feel good about herself and talk to her that way. And that he doesn't like her at all he was just trying to get an answer.

So being madly in love with this man I believed him. But he had to delete her completely from his life and never talk to her again he agreed to do just that. Now it's about a month or two later my trust issues are even worse than before and I keep feeling like he's cheating on me even though when I look on his phone there's nothing.

Am I being too over dramatic about everything or do I have the right to no longer trust him?

Also given his reason would you still consider it cheating?