Am I fat?

In 2014 I weighed 150 and I looked so good then I got pregnant and had a miscarriage at 5 months, and I was 170, then I got the birth control shot just one time and It made me 180 now I'm 190-195 and I hate myself, I don't even try to look good for my man anymore I drink soda everyday and eat fast food all the time. How can I lose this weight?! How can I get the strength to do it?