Irritable and negative outlook

I can't make myself believe that I'll get pregnant. Most women say, "when I get pregnant..." and I feel silly even saying when because I don't know if it's even possible. We've only been trying 7 months, but I'm 37. I just worry I missed my shot or never had one to begin with. I'm seeing an infertility Doctor next month. I'm terrified of what the outcome will be but I also feel like I need to know if everything is working right with my body. Anyone else feeling crazy and in the same boat? I don't think my husband understands how hard this is for me, and every woman in my life has either had children easily or doesn't want them. 😢