Boyfriends suck! Lol

I need some advice...(I'm sure I know the answer already tho ?) my bf n I R 8 years apart. He's young and not used to a serious relationship. He's always bounced around from girl to girl. I on the other hand have been in a coue serious relationships and still learning lol. I know he loves me but he rarely shows me. I literally do it all!! Laundry dishes cleaning shopping cooking and everything in between. He is rude n disrespectful but he's "playing" I don't like it have told him this and remind him I've been in horrible violent n abusive relationships in the pSt. He's always picking a fight n we almost never have sex. I'm very insecure and I don't think he's cheating but idk. Can anyone help me with ideas on how to tLk to a person who gets hostile n defensive when u try n talk about issues?