No sex following therapy

At Christmas I started having flashbacks during sex with my boyfriend. I saw the guy who raped me and the guy who hit me in his face. I didn't enjoy sex and felt scared and vulnerable, eventually I broke down. A few weeks later I signed up for Emdr therapy and it worked so well and i feel so much better. My boyfriend came to every session and sat in the waiting room to make sure I was okay and give me support and i was so grateful because Emdr is tough. It has been a few months since I finished and we have tried to pick up our sex life again but he seems to have lost a lot of confidence and i just don't see him in that way anymore and I think it may go both ways. I am scared we will never feel that way about each other again, even though we are very committed to each other in everything else. Does anyone have constructive advice? Would love some help.
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COMMENT (2)

Ch

Posted at
Do romantic stuff together that isn't all about sex. Like cuddling and him or you running hands over eachothers body's  or kissing or making out while cuddling. Go back to the beginning of stuff like kissing and hand holding and work up to sex when you both are ready

La

Posted at
I have PTSD and what helps my guy is to really stroke his ego. He feels like HE caused the flashback and so it destroys his sexual confidence. Be really up front with him. Talk about how he's the best you've ever had and miss the intimacy and you find yourself craving him. Then straddle him and make out. I know you're struggling, too, so obviously only do that stuff if you're comfortable. He may just be trying to follow your lead, because he might be scared he'll "cause" more flashbacks.Just talk to him ❤.