I had my son at 17, was with his dad in an emotionally and at times physically abusive relationship for 8 years.  When I couldn't take it anymore and started looking for a way out, he began and had been for a long time using my son to keep my in the relationship.  As I knew this was wrong and I did everything in my power to move out and keep a place for my son and I, after 3 years of torment in the court system, my ex left the state with my son, he was 8 at the time.  I was so struggling with trying to heal from the abuse and maintain myslef and finally his abuse worked.  Telling me he wouldn't come after me for child support etc of I just walked away, and my son seeing us fight and his life being torn apart... I succumbed.  I let him go.  

11 year later we are reunited.  He found me on linkdin and I thought we were well on our way to establishing a relationship where his dad could not be involved.  

Things were rocky, he was kicked out by his dad at 14, still in high school was smoking weed.  

I got him through graduation and prom and got him fafsa to go to college, took him to santa Barbara for school.  He then took all the money, never went to school and just partied.  He mooched off a friend and ran up a rental bill that his dad paid off.

Then the riot at UCSB happened, he was right in the middle of it, when he came back I let him move in.  From there he smoked weed, lost two jobs, and began just completely taking over and terrorizing our household.  Final straw was when he called a pot delivery service to our house.  My husband and I newly married decided this was it.  

We sat him down and told him he had to go.  He was 20 at this point.  He stole my dslr camera and left.

We have had several verbally abusive text exchanges to the point that he has threatened me and my hubby, said such hurtful things he can't just take back.  

Today I got an Instagram request to connect.  What should I do!?