Can someone answer this question for me? My anxiety is getting away with me

Ok, so I have been having a hard time with anxiety for a little over two months, I have the perfect boyfriend that I love and never want to hurt, the thought of this kinda makes me sick, but the other day I thought of a guy that has recently gone away to the national guard, I've known him since I was very little, my best friend has a huge crush on him, and we plan together how they will be together and girl stuff like that. I haven't felt lovey or anything, when I was around 8 I had a small crush, but that went away BC I suddenly had a crush on someone else. But anyway, he has been around forever, but we were never close at all.

One day while cleaning the church that he used to go to with us, I thought of him, I think I might miss him being around, it is something I don't like admitting, I don't want any feelings for anyone but my boyfriend, but I think I miss him, and it scares me and my anxiety is making it into a big thing.

Before he left I never thought about him. But now that he left I sometimes do, is that ok? I don't know what to think or do, I feel really bad. What do you guys think it is? What would u do with it?