Need to vent (no judging pleas)

Nikki
I really need to vent.... just have so much building up and feel like i need some one to talk to and let it out. I feel like my health is going down hill. My bf is a bit older than me and he makes my life a living hell! Hes cheated so many times when i was first pregnant and even after... he even had sex with two other woman in our apartment when i was living with my parents and raising our daughter alone!! I found it all out on my own and snapped so bad. Now when i got pregnant again and gained the weight he started with fat jokes.. I have bad self esteem about my body it was like adding salt to a wound. Both my pregnancys i had bad complications. My bf promised hed help with our son and he lied. After a day of givng birth i requested to be discharged to go with my son to another hospital nicu.. Well my bf gave me no time to rest postpartum. All i heard was youre a pig and lazy for not cleaning and cooking. He expects me to be skinner, bigger boobs, bigger ass and wear makeup all the time even the clothes he likes. So seriously no postpartum healing time. Now he still makes fun of me and contiues to tell me im a lazy, fat ,crazy, pig.. He does not work and sits on his dam ass playing games. All he does is sweep and make a bed wich to him is hard work and makes him tired.. I have to clean dishes,table, stove, watch both kids, change both there diapers, dress them, shower them, feed them. I breast feed so i get hardly no sleep on top but hes the only one who can complain about being so tired and stressed. I also have to make him food and bring it to him and clean his mess.. I mean is this shit even ok?! Like i dont even eat half the dam time but im the loony one and need to do it all to make sure he wont be upset. He wont even change,dress or shower his own dam son!! I treat him like complete shit and im abusive because he said i am.. He wont even get up to make himself food and if i dont cook he complains to his mom and it makes me look like a bad person.. Because of her i feel to bad taking the kids away but im so fucking sick of this relationship! I just want to be with my parents and family and raise my kids alone..i tried making it work like my parents told me to and im just cant contiue supporting a bad relationship that is affecting my daughter real bad. i complain,bitch and nag to much to like he told me.. I mean you dont work and get to sleep, eat and leave the whole rest to me.. i cry so much, getting migrains and feel alone.vent over. Thank u guys again