I gave birth 4 weeks ago and i am still crying with every little thing. I tried to breastfeed exclusively but the nurses did not help me at all with correct latching and my nipples cracked and bled. Every time i was trying to breastfeed i was crying from pain. My baby was not taking enough milk as she did not latch correctly and she was crying and hungry every half an hour making the process even more painful. 5 days later i took a pill to stop breastfeeding and i feel like a failure. I was crying nonstop and i still feel that i am a bad mother for not be able to offer my baby the gift of breastfeeding. I believe that i make everything wrong. I am always very stressed and i don't get much sleep as i stay awake to watch her sleep and ensure that she is OK. Now due to money issues, i had to accept a job offer that starts in a month and i feel terrible that i have to be away for so many hours. But we need the money for the baby. I really don't know how i will be able to work with 2-3 hours of sleep and with only one meal per day, since i really don't want to eat anything. I feel like a zombie and the only thing that is keeping me alive is my little girl. She also has colic and i feel guilty that she may be in pain only because i feed her formula and i was not able to breastfeed. My family is trying to be supportive but they do not accept that i may have pp depression and they are just trying to make me feel better by saying that it will pass away. But this makes me feel so lonely and i feel that nobody understands what i am going through.