Help?

Okay ladies, I have a question. My best friend and I dated over four years ago. I was 13-14 years old and he was 15-16. It ended, blah blah blah. Some things happened after we broke up (not going to discuss them, not relevant) and we stopped talking for about 2 years or so. We started talking again about 2 years or so ago and we are the best of friends. He got a girlfriend and she was really really jealous of our friendship but then she realized we were just friends and it was okay. Well, no I've got the same situation with my boyfriend. My friends girlfriend understands his mind set and wants to talk to him and he won't. I don't want to lose him over this but I don't want to lose my friend either. I just don't know what to do. Help?