Envious of the younger ladies

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I've taken at least 6-7 hpt's in the last few days, all negative. I haven't started AF yet, but I've got the cramps and the giant boobs, as per usual for me when I'm about to start. I'm getting older. I can't do this much longer. Time is not on my side. I'm not only envious of the women that get pregnant so easily, I'm also envious of all of you younger ladies that aren't hearing the loud TICK TOCK of the biological clock. 
I was on Depo, and just waited too long to start TTC #2, and now feel like I am paying dearly for it. I am always cheering everyone on, and am genuinely rooting for each and every one of us to get our BFP, but I'm fighting a serious case of envy. I'm so sorry and ashamed to even admit it. I know I'm just hitting a plateau and will be back to the bouncy, happy-go-lucky, dust spreading-Staci again soon. I think I just needed to take a moment to vent. 
Ladies, I really do wish you all so much luck, and apologize for the pity party I just threw for myself. 
I'm. Going to call New Years BFP for all of us that missed it for Christmas!!! 
WooOooOooOoo!!! ??
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