Feel Discouraged

Stepfanie
I'm on CD37 and I have had 5 negative pregnancy test. My cycles have usually been between 30-35 days. It was once 39 days few months ago, but normally 30-35. Before if I had a negative test it usually doesn't affect me as much since I kept telling myself maybe next month. Last year we tried not trying to get pregnant, hoping it would just happen unexpectedly, but it didn't happen. So the past few months we have actively TRIED. Idk if it's because I had purchased digital but SEEING the word not pregnant just broke me today. I'm trying to stay positive but I think I'm going to focus on losing weight and being healthy. 
My mom had passed away when I was 7, and this app is the only place I feel like I can vent. My husband doesn't understand the emotional struggle, and I don't want to talk to my dad because I feel like it's awkward. I guess I'm just looking for words of encouragement. Feel like it wasn't hard to get pregnant with my daughter since she wasn't planned and I was in college. But now that I'm married to a great man and we want more kids, it seems nearly impossible.