Funerals: To Go or Not To Go: That Is The Question!
Sorry this is really long...
So I went up to see my grandma today. She's 93 and is doing really well for someone her age. She kept talking about my grandpa, who died in 2000. It was weird because she kept telling us about how she was tying his shoes so they could go to the doctor, and he just smiled at her... and fell over dead. Yeah...
I'd never heard that story before. I just thought he'd died of a heart attack (I was 8 when he passed). Anyway, my grandma is in the hospital (literally found out when I got home 😥). My parents' assumption is that she might not make it. I don't know how to handle grief very well. I also am not ready to say goodbye nor go to the funeral. I'm the only person in my family who's black, and I've always been slightly insecure about myself. I can't tell my parents that I don't want to go to her funeral (IF she does die) because the rest of my family will think less of me (that's what I think, at least).
Look, I love my grandma dearly. I really do! I just don't want to be forced to do something that makes me feel super uncomfortable and awkward. Any suggestions?
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