So last night I ended up going to the hospital. I had one of my attacks which are called pyschogenic non epileptic attacks. Basically I have pseudo seizures if anyone has heard of that term. What basically happens is my brain becomes stressed and it wants to shut down and forget everything. I also have had some things happen to me. So this seizure like activity is pyschological. Well I ended up having one of these attacks and I ended up not being able to move. All I could move was my eyes so I could blink my mouth and my fingers. My pain tolerance was so low anything hurt me. I got my bs taken in the ambulance and I cried because it hurt so badly. Then I also couldn't talk. I go to the hospital wasn't able to talk for 4 or 5 hours. I was scared to go to sleep because im afraid I won't wake up. I was told by my grandpa I wouldn't wake up but I told him no. I miss him terribly. He's been gone quite some time for 10 years almost. But I finally went to sleep and I woke up :) the er doctor said I had a panic attack I guess. I don't know they don't know anything really. Well the bad part is I don't remember anyone except my mom. I wanted to go home with her tonight but she left me :'( I guess I don't live with her. I know there's a God and I just want to tell him please help me get better. I need to get better for my family. I have people who love me and I don't know them. Anyone who is struggling with life right now let it go if you can and worry about your health and who you have in your life. That is essential. Love is an amazing. Having loving, caring people around is good for your health don't let anyone get you down. God Bless everyone and please pay attention to yourself it's very important.