done with babies!

ivana
my husband is quite upset about how i feel, but i am sure i will not have another baby (we just got our first after years of ttc). 
i had a horrible pregnancy, i was miserable and in pain all the time, and hated every second of it. 
i was preparing myself for natural medicine/free birth, but ended up with emergrncy c-section and general anesthesia at 37+5.
my breast got severly engorged and i developed horrible mastits and had to stop breastfeeding. 6 weeks later i still have milk (enough for two babies!), but my baby cannot take it because of all the medicine they gave me. 
my son is wonderful, i love him to bits, but i cannot stand seeing him cry in pain because of gas and colics, when he is tired and sleepy but cries for hours because of the pain. 
i simply cannot go through all this again, i am too weak. 
i hope i'm not alone.