I must be a horrible Mom

Update: He slept pretty good last night, I got at least 3 FULL hours of sleep. 
I feel like a new womannnn!!!!! 🎤🎤😍🙃
I just can't handle it anymore. I have no patience. My 3 month old cries all the time. I do everything I can to console him and it's to no avail. It's like he hates me. Sometimes when I talk he cries even louder. 
I've lost it the last three nights, I've actually yelled at him to shut up. I had to leave him in his crib to go cry myself, because how the fuck did I lose my patience? Idk why these last two weeks I just can't handle the crying , I can't handle not knowing why he is crying, why he won't sleep, why he is so restless. 
I understand he's going through changes, but 20 minutes of sleep just isn't enough. I feel like such a fucking bad Mom because im losing my patience. He's just a baby. Fuck. 
He is rolling over, and trying to crawl, I have the wonder weeks books, he isn't colicky, he doesn't have food allergies, he isn't gassy, and I fucking can't stand myself or him. He used to wake up happy and he just seems upset most of the time now. We had one good day out of 14 so far. 
He's good when he is around other people but my family lives an hour away, and I just can't drive up there every single day. 
I hate myself when I feel like this, I hate myself for not being able to control myself, I hate myself for getting mad at this little baby, when obviously something is bothering him, and that something is probably me.