So it's been about 8 weeks, so this is a kinda late birth story but something inspired me to share today. On the date of my scheduled c-section, I awoke feeling nervous but also happy that I would finally get to meet my baby boy. (I needed to have a c-section due to a previous surgery to remove uterine fibroids which put me at risk for rupturing my uterus if I went into labor). My mom came to pick me up (I'm a single mama) and we headed down to the hospital. When we arrived they sent us to the waiting room since they were so busy. I was kinda disappointed we had to wait but we made the best of it taking some final selfies of my last day being pregnant. About an hour later I was in the room being prepped for my surgery. The anxieties came back, but the anesthesiologist and nurses were wonderful and helped me feel at ease. I got my spinal done and the OBs came in and got started. I felt no pain or pressure, and after a short while I heard a tiny cry. My baby was born and he was completely perfect!! He stayed in the room with me while I got stitched up then I held him while they wheeled me to recovery. Everything went well in recovery and I was feeling great! Even the nurses commented on how well I looked for just having a baby/major surgery. Baby had a slightly low temperature, which I was reassured was normal since he was a little early at 37 weeks. Due to the temp problems we couldn't spend much time practicing his latch, but  otherwise everything was great and he just filled my heart with joy and love. Eventually we got moved to my room on maternity and I got settled in to get some rest for the night. My mom left to go home and refresh with plans to come back and stay with me. Shortly after she left I started feeling unwell. My heart was racing and I felt sweaty and anxious. My nurse came to check on me, recommended we send the baby to the nursery while she got a hold of the doctor. At that point my heart rate was over 150, and I started having trouble breathing. More nurses filled the room and I deteriorated quickly. I was pale, gasping for air, my heart rate was almost 200, and my blood pressure was tanking. Initially they tried to get my heart rate down thinking I had thrown a blood clot, giving me a medication to restart my heart. This was awful, as you can feel your heart slow, then come to a stop. Even worse, it did nothing to help. I was so afraid I was going to die. At this point my mom came back to find my room filled with doctors, nurses and a respiratory therapist, with no idea what was wrong. She just told me to be strong and that I would make it through. Luckily they figured out I was bleeding internally and I was taken to ICU. 5 units of blood and another surgery later, the bleeding was under control. The recovery was TERRIBLE, due to pain and incredible amount of swelling from the pooled blood and extra IV fluids I was given. The worst part was being in the ICU unable to even see my newborn baby but for a few minutes a day. I tried to show a brave face but inside I was dying. My poor baby spent the first almost week of his life only seeing the nursery staff most of the day, and to this day it makes me sad. I had some more complications before I could finally get discharged, including a bowel obstruction which gave me the worst pain I could ever imagine. But God brought us through it all and both baby and I are now healthy and doing well. I still wonder what effect those first days will have on our bond, but for now he is a happy, handsome baby boy. It was such a traumatic and frightening experience but I'd do it all again for him ❤️