on the edge

I'm 13 It feels like I'm lost normally I vent to my sister but when I call she never picks up bc she's in college now I'm really depressed and stressed from small stuff like thinking I'm ugly to big situations like I want to kill my self I have no one to turn to everyone says it'll get better so they normally don't mind it and my friends laugh at me for being emotional I tried talking to god but it's not working I really need someone to talk to I really think I don't want to live anymore