What does mean to be a good wife?

Question

I'm posting here because there is the bigger group here. I'm married with 2under2 babies. I love my husband and he is a good man, husband  and dad. He told me I'm a control freak and an unloving wife. I just  want to be a better woman to him. How do you define a good wife?

Answer

I don't think you can define what a good wife is. Unconditional love, support, encouragement, being a help meet, being a best friend, not focusing on what makes me happy...but what can I do to make my husband happy which usually makes me happy!, and I remind myself that it's not all about me. I think those things are what I strive to be/do. I used to be so naggy to him and I have learned to keep my mouth shut and that has helped so much! I'm his wife...not his mom. But if you are doing everything you think is right, maybe this is something your husband has to change his feelings on. Maybe he was in a bad mood and said some things he didn't mean.

I bet you are a fabulous wife and a wonderful mother. 💓

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That was rude of him.. maybe he should be working on being a good husband instead

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That question has a different answer to everyone. Consider going to a few couples counseling sessions and see if you guys can work on being better for each other. It's never fair when it's just one person accusing the other of not being enough of something while they go on thinking they are perfect.

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He is probably feeling neglected, and jealous, since you've become pregnant with #3.  You are naturally not paying as much attention to him, and trying to get things more organized, with the impending additional responsibilities of a third child.

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That's a hard question.. I guess my definition of a good wife would be to be his biggest supporter,  show him affection once in a while, and just I think the basics; loyal, faithful, and unconditional love.. But of course, he has to do the same. Marriage is a partnership.

Answer

I think sometimes two people need to be more understanding and open minded to their partners different love languages.  If he thinks you're unloving, maybe he just doesn't realize that some of the things you're doing are the way you show it.  My partner and I have very different love languages and it's taken a lot of really blunt conversation to start to see how we show we love each other.  I'm very physical, where for him helping me with daily tasks and being supportive is his main way.
I tend to be a control freak, but not in a way that I control HIM but that I like to have control of my surroundings and life as much as possible.  It's a personal need I feel and my partner respects that.
I didn't see where in your post you said he accused you of nagging so I don't see why people replied saying you shouldn't nag.
Your husband should also be more specific about what it is you do to make him feel unloved.  It's his job to communicate his feelings.
I think the happiest relationships happen when two people meet each other where they are.  They communicate openly and without attackig the other.  And they focus on how they can better love the other person every day.

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If he thinks ur controlling,u might need to work on that. Talk to him about hat exactly he meant and try to fix it.

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Respect your husband. Be encouraging. Pray for your family. Loving.

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I learnt that picking your battles is so important. Before nagging at him, think "does this problem matters in 20 years, is it gonna make me happier down the road". You'll be surprised to find out that most shits women complain about are actually useless little things that would not make us happier if fixed. Let him be him and learnt to close your eyes on unimportant matters ! Control freaks are no fun for anyone

Answer

What is it that he says makes you a bad wife?