Learning how to forgive

Tailyr
I need advice.
I've been with my boyfriend a little over two years, and in the beginning (within the first 3-4 months) he did something shady and completely ruined my trust. He didn't cheat on me- but went behind my back and hurt me. That's a whole other story. Anyways, ever since then it's been so hard to trust him. And I WANT to trust him. He's my best friend and were perfect for each other. Since then he hasn't done anything. But he will do random stuff like ogle a woman in front of me and I know he's a guy and guys do that, but my anxiety is so awful that I constantly feel like I'm not good enough. I really feel like I'm being held back from fully enjoying this relationship. I'm a mess. Please help. Btw, we were wasted in this picture.