40 Weeks in the Dark!

Victoria
I'm just pissed that everyone knows, like 3cm and 50% effaced and stuff! I haven't had a midwife appointment since week 38 and they don't check shit like that! I'm now 40w1d and have no clue about my progress only that if something happens I have to call them! I don't know I'm a first timer! What if something is already wrong I just don't know about it! Aagghhh!!! Well I have an appointment scheduled for Wednesday so maybe I'll push to know more then, I feel like they are treating me like I should already know what's happening! Or that they don't have the resources but COME ON, how much does a literally 10 minute appointment really cost the NHS?! My midwife is nice but I'm having to google a lot more than I feel I should. 
Sorry for the emo rant, it's one of those days and I'm a little anxious. 
I have concluded that nothing causes more suspense and anxiety than waiting for the birth of a child!
Xxx.