ex shit

You ever try to get back together with your ex (in my case my sons father) to see if you can work it out (I'm dumb cause it never does) but you just don't feel it with him anymore. No butterflies, no Sparks, no smiles, no happy feelings. Just nothing but tell me why I still have feelings for him ?? Like wtf. Maybe it's cause I'm lonely and I don't have any guys I'm talking too and he still shows interest in me so I think he's honestly the best I could probably ever get cause guys completely ignore my existence and I settle with him and honestly I think he settles with me too cause I know he doesn't care about me/love me. I'm so frustrated.