Boyfriend Dispute
My boyfriend and I are moving in together as I made a pist about a while back. He will never clean and his hygeine is... well that of an 18 year old, maybe a little below average. It bothers me, but up until now I've always been conciderate. He is slowly starting to become more hygenic, thankfully but the cleaning thing remains a very tricky task to handle. He won't get rid of any of his excess of "stuff". He himself says "I have a shit ton of stuff". Things that could be sold or donated to those who are much less fortunate than he is will not be sold or donated. I suspect that it is because he is too lazy to go through his stuff and hordes things. Because he also hates cleaning is how clutter emasses to what it is.
I've told him how this bothers me on a general level, how it triggers my anxiety, and how my OCD will end up creating a very hostile environment for me. He thinks that by exposing me to severe cases of dirtiness he is curing me. He honestly wants to help, but he is going about it all wrong and is too stubborn to see any change. I sent him this text:
There are two options: if we live in your place then we can keep all your stuff like you say you like and all that but it will involve
a huge deep cleansing where together you and I both work to
making the house look organized after that you and I both do some upkeep and shared chores. Then every 6 months we hire Molly Maid company to clean our home
OR
If we live in a one bedroom or studio there will be less stuff in our apartment that can physically fit but with some storage and DIY, we can make
it work. Still won't have every little thing but we will have the major things we care about. This means I can clean everything on my own without your help and get it done quickly all in one day
If he does not change, should we break up?
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