My miscarriage story
As the healing section will be launching soon i thought I'd share my miscarriage story for those of you going through the same thing. Sending you lots of hugs.
My husband and I were trying for a year before we saw that positive line. It was my 2nd clomid attempt and we were over the moon. After watching our friends and siblings get pregnant and give birth it was finally our turn.
The good news came on May 31st - we were having a baby! Everything we had dreamed of was finally going to happen! From that moment that baby became our entire world - it was all we thought about, talked about, and we couldn't help but break the news to our family, making it more real
At 8 weeks we went in for an ultrasound - the baby was in there, like a little pea and we were so excited. Until we were told that the heartbeat was slow and that we shouldn't get too excited just yet...
2 weeks later we went back in for another ultrasound where we were told that we had lost our baby. Our entire world collapsed. How could this happen? Why us? Did we do something to make this happen? Was I a bad mother? It was the worst day of my life.
Going home and taking the pills killed me - my heart was completely broken into a million pieces. These pills were abortion pills - how could I abort my baby?! We cried and cried. Two days later the pills hadnt worked. As i had no bleeding yet I had in my mind that it wanted to stay with me too.
A few days later I took the pills again, they worked - the pain I was in physically was excruciating, but nothing like what I was feeling mentally and emotionally- nothing could top that. That week my sister in law gave birth to a baby girl. I was a wreck but I like to think that my niece is my angel - with a little part of my baby in her.
Recovering was so hard, for months I cried every day while trying to stay strong, even the smallest thing would tip me off. A part of me will always be broken - but every day it gets a little better.
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