punishment?

Question

Ok I know this is not my kid but it seems so wrong-

My boyfriend has a 6 year old we've been together for 5 1/2 years so I've been in his sons life since he was small.

We get him on the weekends but there is not a court agreement set up.

He is a great kid and very sweet

He got in trouble at school  for stabbing someone with a pencil he said they were playing zombies on the playground n he said it made a little mark and he felt bad and said sorry right away. I know he wouldn't intentionally do it.

Well for punishment his mom tried to ground him from our family Christmas party today- well he got to go but he couldn't play with anything he got . And he says at home he isn't allowed to watch tv and missed out on their family trip to look st Christmas lights.

She also grounded him from our house Friday night but he got to stay at his nanas house and got to play on iPad-

So is this fair??

Answer

I'd just try not to make a big deal outta it. It's temporary.

Answer

Sounds like she's blaming you for why he did what he did at school. 
I understand the punishment but she shouldn't have been allowed to do anything.

Answer

Our five year old son had three weeks of consistent problems at school (4/5 days of disrespect, fighting with other kids, talking over his teacher, etc) and it's measured on an app by "points." Three means he had a "bad day" respect wise. So the last week before winter break (this past week) we told him he couldn't get more than 2 or he's not opening ANY presents on Christmas Day.  He got FOUR negatives on Tuesday. He won't be opening any gifts his extended family gives him, and he'll have to earn them by having one good week at a time once break ends.

Would ONE event have triggered this harsh punishment? No. I think you have to examine what else your stepson may have done recently at school or at home. If his mother has other reasons, those are her own, and your significant other and she need to work them out.

Personally, I think one event like that is relatively serious because stabbing someone with a pencil is a very hurtful and dangerous thing. We're what some might think of as overly harsh when our son uses violence at school because one day he may use it against the wrong person and it won't end well for him. The severity of the punishment shows kids how serious we think the indiscretion was.

Answer

This is unfair. When my step son gets in trouble as his moms, she tells us so we can continue to punish him so he knows he can't come to dads and everything will be fine. We usually take away toys and limit tv time and no staying up late because we know this is what she does so we try to be consistent and vice versa. She needs to work on coparenting to come up with something together than to take away time with his dad, especially since it is limited. Sorry you're dealing with this.

Answer

Her punishments should be in her time only.  And no way should they include not seeing dad.

Answer

No. Absolutely not fair. The mom is punishing him from you and your partner. She still gets to be the good guy. 
 
Good co-parenting, IMO, would have been a half punishment from both both parents. He was punished from something on her end and her time and then y'all, if you felt it appropriate (sounds like he genuinely didn't do it maliciously, come on, he's 6!), do a small punishment too.

punishment?

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