Pregnant after miscarriage

Sarah • TTC since April 2016. MMC #1 Sept `16 MMC #2 Jan `17 Ectopic and Tube Removed Nov ‘17
And I am really struggling to allow myself to enjoy this.. 
I am 5 weeks pregnant after a miscarriage at 7 weeks back in August. The miscarriage absolutely destroyed me and I've been struggling with it ever since. It was without a doubt the worst thing that ever happened to me. 
Now I just assume this will go the same way, I'm having faint tummy cramps only today and I'm just terrified this is going to happen again. I'm booking a private scan for 7 weeks (as they don't scan you til 12 weeks in the UK unless you're actively bleeding) but I'm scared I won't even make it to the early scan. 
I'm sure others have unfortunately been through this as well, have you got any advice for me? I'm just so scared, I can't explain it any other way 😢