my week

 

Background story is I've been with my fiancée since August but weve known each other since March. He proposed December 9th and we decided together I would stop taking birth control. We're not necessarily TTC but we're not doing anything to stop it. We get a long like lovers and best friends 99% of the time until this freakin week. 

Monday morning I looked through his phone because he's been sneaky and I knew something was up. I found a text in his phone to "Kelly". He basically tells her some shit about her being a cup of sugar and he has to go because she's making his dick hard. We fight about it and he tells me his coworker was talking to her on his phone. 🙄 and then continues to tell me if I can't trust him then we have nothing. I don't believe him but think maybe he won't do anything stupid again. We made up by the end of the day because I'm not gonna give up this relationship that easy and I truly do love him and think he loves me. He says he wouldn't have asked to marry me or have his baby if he didn't want to be with me. He tells me he deleted Kelly's number (I didn't ask him to). We had sex. 

Tuesday morning I wake him up at 3:15 to get ready for work. We both work for my dad. He tells me he's sick of me and my dad's shit and he's not going to work. I get PISSED and go lay on the couch. He begs me to get back in bed so I do and I start to cry and then he tells me he can't believe I'm crying and it's obviously gonna be a long engagement because I don't trust him and I cry over everything. We make up by the end of the day. We did not have sex. 

Wednesday was great. We had a fun day together. My engagement ring had been sent in to be resized so we went to pick it up and everything was great. No sex. He says he's tired and that I am hornier than him in a joking way. 

Thursday was pretty ok. He did get fired/quit but I think it was for the best because I don't want him and my dad to hate each other and I know we can make it work. He's already out looking for another job today. I glanced at his phone to read a text that he got to him and bam there's Kelly's name in his recent conversations.  I don't say a word because I don't want to accuse him of anything without knowing what they talked about. 

Friday morning rolls around and I look at his phone before he gets out of bed because I wanna know what was said. He made plans to "lick and fuck and work her ass" after she gets out of court today. What the fuck?? I'm speechless. I took a picture of the message and haven't said a word. I'm at work and he's supposed to be meeting up with his friend today to apply for jobs together. He'll be in the office later today to pick up his check. 

It's Christmas weekend and I don't have a clue what to do. I'm not the type to scream and shout and fight. I love him more than I've ever loved anyone and I honestly pictured us spending the rest of our lives together. I live with him and I have no money saved up and nowhere to go. I guess I'm not even sure if I'm ready for advice but I really needed to get this off my chest. My best friend is the only one who knows anything and she obviously tells me to leave. His mom knows a little because we're very close but she hasn't offered me much advice because I think she knows I'm good for him. 

So there it is...that's my week. Talk about an emotional roller coaster.