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worried

Hayden • Sat, Dec 31

I'm so worried that I'll have to start giving my little one formula. I don't want to at all! She's run me dry since yesterday. She is 10 weeks and 2 days. I don't want to formula feed because I supplemented with my daughter (yes, it was easier) and she developed Type 1 Diabetes and Celiac disease at the age of 4 years+2.5 months and I knew from infancy she had tummy problems and everything was just dismissed by her pedi. I know she must have had a genetic disposition to develop them but I also strongly feel cows milk and soy based formulas were the culprit and I don't want to even have that guilt in the back of my mind for Lively like I do for Kynlee-Ann.

I'm a teacher and went back to school the beginning of December and pumped twice a day. Just before break my supply really diminished, like down to 2-2.5 ounces from each breast.

I have a very small stash of backup in the freezer but idk how much she's actually going to consume once I have to send her to daycare on Wednesday. (My mom kept her the two weeks I went back in December and will keep her Monday and Tuesday with my 7 year old daughter). I've exclusively bf since I've been home on break. My supply increased for several days and is now back down.

I don't want to send her to daycare!!!! I don't want to wake her up before the ass crack of dawn to feed her and get her ready to leave! We will have to leave by 6am on weeks I have morning duty because my shitty ass school opens the freaking doors at 7am. I hate it. I'm a ball of frustrated and worried nerves right now.