Am i crazy?

So in the end of summer before college i was dating this guy. We fell in love and i would always go to see him at his university and he would come and see me too. We were like best friends who loved each other. In september i went to his apartment at his university after it had been a while since we had seen each other. So as you probably know like every person has their needs and we had sex. Then we went to eat and saw a movie. I slept over his place and we had morning sex and hung out the rest of the day before he had class. About a week later he beoke up with me and i was heartbroken and confused. He said he was not ready to start a relationship but he still wanted to either be exclusive or just be friends. It was so hard for me after being pet down so hard by so many other guys. I just felt so used. A couple months go by and i see this girl constantly on his snap and i ask him like who is that. And he is like oh this girl im talking to. And i was like well are you guys fucking or what. Mind you he still love me at the time. Or so i thought. So fast forward to today i see his friend and i reminded me of him so i texted him to see how he was doing. He said please dont ever text me out of respect i have a gorlfriend. Am i crazy. I loved this guy and he broke my heart because he didnt want a relationship but then goes around and gets himself a girlfriend. My self esteem is so low. I feel like there is something wrong with me and i dont know what to do except sit on my phone and think about the whole conversation that is on replay in my head. 😭