Me and my husband have been havin some issues for about 8 or 9 months now. I'm a recovering addict, he is also. Back in June I had a slip up and got the stuff from my EX.. the one that got me started on drugs in the first place. Anyways, he's so nasty now, no teeth, skinnier than me and I'm 117 lbs!!!! He's grossssss!!!! Anyways Shawn (my husband) swears up and down that I fucked him and cheated on him blah blah. I didn't, I really didn't! So since then he has completely changed towards me, doesn't believe me, his dad's 55 yrs old, his gf is the same Age as my husband (31) and she was my BEST friend for almost 3 years and she woke up one day and told on me for everything me and her done and then added some Shit with it and he will not believe me for shit!!!!!! So, he doesn't cuddle me, hug me, kiss me, we don't have sex. he never takes his eyes off his phone. We've had sex once in the last year and that was New Years cause we were drunk... & it lasted for like maybe 2 fcking mins.... that's it!! But lately I've been going thru his phone while he's asleep and shit and seeing that he's adding all these bitches from random ass places and messaging them telling them he's 'separated'!!!! 😡😡😡 it has really struck a nerve in me.. this is hurtin me and I do EVERY house chore, laundry, I take 100% responsibility of our 1 year old. I am being loyal, I stay home unless I have a dr appt or something and thats all. He says if I wanna stay here and work us out it's gonna take him a long time to forgive me for what I done 'if he does forgive me' but he's talking to all these women and shit and it's really messing with me. My mind tells me to go and find me and my daughter our own place and get a job (I can't work he won't let me) but my heart is saying 'no, stop!!! You stay with him and fight for your husband and your marriage!' Like I do love him sooooo much I know I'll never find another like him there's just shit about him that I'm in love with, we've been together for 5 hrs, married for almost 3, but is it right for him to be talking to other women labeling himself as separated? Because 'I hurt him in the worst way and destroyed him and he doesn't trust me' And also, is it normal for a married man to be in FB groups with 2/3 naked women in them? While he has a wife that will please him in any way he wants and will do anything for him? One more question, am I a fucking idiot for staying this long and being treated like this? He's controlling, he's cut me off from some of my family because of the mistake in June.. I just want us to work out and be a happy family again. I literally have to scrape pennies up if I have to go some where for gas money cause he 'don't trust me' with money... I'm misersble guys, I'm physically and emotionally drained! I need help!! I need a lot of advice. Please no judgment! I have been trying to stay and work it out for our daughter.. I grew up in a broken home and it was awful. My step mom abused me for 10 yrs.. I guess I have anxiety over something like that happening to Ava.. please help. I don't have anyone, no friends, nothing.. I'm so embarrassed but I'm going stir crazy thinking about this crap constantly!