Love & Sex
First loves. Best kisses. Sexcapades. Break ups. We want to hear your stories about Love & Sex. Share them here.
My boyfriend of nearly a year suffers with sexsomnia. I was the first to inform him of it, and we both had to do some research before we finally understood it.
For those who don't know about it: Sexsomnia is a form of insomnia in which the sufferer commits sexual acts and advances while asleep without any idea they're doing it or recollection when they wake up.
I wouldn't say my boyfriend's case is 'severe' because we have never had sex while he's had sexsomnia. I can now (mostly) distinguish when he's asleep and when he's awake. His behaviour is very different, which makes it a lot easier for me.
I've read a lot of stigma online lately from uneducated people accusing sufferers of rape and sexual assault. I've also read a lot of people accusing the partner's of the sufferers sexually assaulting or raping their partner because they let them go ahead with it.
I just want to say that it can be very hard to determine when your partner is awake or asleep. Especially if you have a highly sexual relationship. For some, it's easy. For instance, my partner continues to snore as he will direct my hand to touch him, or touch me himself. I'm always too tired to think much into it and will pull away from him.
Just last night though, my boyfriend reached across the bed and pulled me by my arm onto his chest, and because that was the most he's done in his sleep before, I asked if he was awake. He gyrated his hips into me for 3 seconds before his limbs went limp and he started snoring again. Otherwise, I wouldn't have known if he was awake or not.
Of course, I always fill my partner in the next morning. It's all a new thing for him. I've lost a lot of sleep staying with him, waking up to the constant touching and moving. It doesn't bother me like it might some people. I've learned just to wait until the moment passes and then move away, or move him.
Does anyone else here know of someone with sexsomnia or do you yourself deal with it?